


You'll always have a chance with me in my world

by Serendipity (jenjaemrens)



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, M/M, Not Beta Read, Reminiscing the past, Sadness, angst with angst ending, mentions of smoking, sunaosa - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-30
Updated: 2021-01-30
Packaged: 2021-03-16 13:01:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,303
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29082807
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jenjaemrens/pseuds/Serendipity
Summary: " But then again, didn’t Suna and Osamu love each other when they were 15? Where did they go wrong?“Hey, where did we go wrong?” Suna blurts out. "Or, a winter night, the faint noise in the background of the present, and two people stuck in the past.
Relationships: Miya Osamu/Akaashi Keiji- Minor, Miya Osamu/Suna Rintarou
Comments: 5
Kudos: 15





	You'll always have a chance with me in my world

**Author's Note:**

> Tbh, I didn't really intend to write this. It just happened lol. I don't even know if this is okay, but it's here now and there's nothing we can do about it.  
> The title is from this [song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5m2XqQQ7jrE) and the fic is also inspired by this song.  
> I hope you guys like it! It really wasn't my intention that my first fic for sunaosa be angst but...lol  
> anyways, my next fic will be better i swear and it will be for sunaosa exchange!

“You’re going to get sick out here.”

Osamu doesn’t turn to look at him as Suna enters the cold balcony. He simply shrugs in answer.

“I’d rather be sick than have to hear the MSBY trio scream for another minute.” 

Suna laughs as he stands beside Osamu. For a while, they stand there quietly, maybe cherishing the quiet and peace in the balcony compared to the chaos that was inside the apartment. Or maybe, it was that Suna and Osamu no longer knew what to say to each other anymore.

It was almost amusing to him how they had both changed over the years. Years ago, hours with Osamu felt only minutes, but now minutes felt like hours. Once, Osamu never hesitated to look at him and smile because Suna was the reason for him to smile. Once, they weren’t 'Suna and Osamu' but simply 'Samu and Rin'.

But then again, that was years ago.

“You sure your boyfriend won’t mind you ditching him like this?” Suna tries to tease.

He hopes Osamu doesn’t notice the waver in his voice. He hopes Osamu’s eyes don’t flicker down to the railing where Suna’s hands are clenched tightly.

“He has his own thing to handle.” Osamu shrugs.

Suna didn't need him to specify. He saw enough of it inside when he saw Akaashi having to handle Bokuto. He simply nods, and again they’re both quiet. Not quite awkward, but not quite so comfortable. Nothing like High School when they would spend hours together in comforting silence.

Suna wonders if it’s too much to ask for if he wishes things were like that again. Was it wrong to feel his heartbreak every time he sees Osamu look at someone else? 

Suna should be doing that as well. He should be moving forward and not think about the what-ifs. He should have accepted that date he got asked out for. Maybe he should be listening to Washio and meet his single friend who apparently was interested in him. He could even try to ask Motoya.

Yet every time he tries to take a step forward, he stops and looks back. He remembers the first year of Inarizaki when he enters the classroom and sits beside a boy who was already dozing off. He remembers befriending said boy and finding comfort in him in this strange new town where he knew no one. He remembers the moment he realized he was in love with this boy on a Tuesday afternoon as he laughs with Gin while the Miya twins argue. It was a split second when he had looked at Suna. His hair askew, his tie crooked, and rice stuck on the corner of his smirking lips, yet Suna thought he looked beautiful.

Miya Osamu had always been beautiful. On the first day of school, when Suna saw him for the first time and even now out here in the cold and dim, golden lights that reflected on his face and took Suna’s breath away. It had been years, and Miya Osamu still had the power to stun him with his beauty.

“Shouldn’t you be taking care of Atsumu then?” 

Another shrug. “He has Sakusa. I took care of that shit when he couldn’t. It’s time for him to pay his dues.”

Suna chuckles. “Yeah, I do remember you keeping count every time you stopped Atsumu from doing something embarrassing so you can later charge Sakusa.”

“I accept his payment in the form of: 'I will take care of whatever the fuck your brother does for the rest of his life.'”

“Rest of his life, huh?”

Osamu glances at him. For a minute he observes him before saying, “He has a ring. Atsumu.”

“Ahh.”

Figures. Of course, Atsumu has a ring. Atsumu had always been sure of his path in life. He never wavered for a second once he made a decision. When he was young, Atsumu had decided that Volleyball was going to be it for him. He never strayed from that decision. Sakusa Kiyoomi was also something that Atsumu decided he’d hold onto when he was 15. He never deviated from it. He had loved him since he was 15, and he loves him now when he is 25. It’s not surprising to Suna. 

But then again, didn’t Suna and Osamu love each other when they were 15? Where did they go wrong? Why was he not with a ring now?

“Hey, where did we go wrong?” Suna blurts out.

He regrets the moment he utters those words as he sees Osamu freeze up. He wants to take them back. Maybe he should laugh it off and pretend it was a joke. Maybe he should tease Osamu about it and change the topic. He should do something so he doesn’t ruin what little was left of the relationship they once had. Not as boyfriends but as friends. Because Osamu was his friend first. He was his best friend before he was his boyfriend and he’d rather have that than not have him in his life.

Just as he is about to laugh, Osamu drops his cigarette and looks at him.

“Because we couldn’t deal with the fact that we were changing. We wanted to change but at the same time, we wanted to cling to the old. Atsumu was never like that. He always believed in the words ‘We don’t need memories’. We...we fell off in that.” 

Suna swallows as Osamu speaks.

He couldn’t refute his words. They did fall off in that. Osamu and Suna held on to the past, refusing to accept that the other was changing. They didn’t know how to deal with it. Suna thought of the past whenever he was with Osamu instead of seeing him for who he was growing to become. It wasn’t the distance. It was them.

“What a depressing ending, huh?” Suna smiles at him.

Osamu smiles back. Suna thinks that it was a sad smile. Or was it just him wishing that it was a sad one because he hoped that Osamu still misses him just the way he misses him?

He wanted to reach out and hold him. He wanted to kiss him again. He ached for the simpler days that he never cherished as much as he should have. The days when he could easily reach out to hold Osamu’s hand without a second thought because that’s where they were supposed to be. Kissing him in the locker rooms after practice and laughing together. Pretending to need his help for their homework so that he could look at him for a while longer and chuckling when he saw Osamu blush after he saw Suna was staring at him.

How pathetic. Suna Rintarou was truly a pathetic man.

“We should head back in.” Osamu says.

Suna understands what he truly meant to say. They should go back to reality instead of reminiscing about the past.

“Okay.” 

Together they both walk in. Osamu walks towards Akashi, who was laughing as Bokuto explained something excitedly. Suna looks at how Akaashi’s eyes turn towards Osamu and light up when he sees him. He reaches out and Osamu smiles as he takes his hand.

Suna turns away and walks towards Komori.

He doesn’t notice the eyes on him after he turns away.

He doesn’t notice the way Osamu pursed his lips as he saw him laugh at something Motoya was saying. 

He doesn’t notice how Akaashi repeatedly called Osamu’s name multiple times because Osamu didn’t hear him call out for him. 

He doesn’t realize that Osamu knows that Suna, too, has moved on in his way and that pains him more than anything else. Because right now, Osamu was no longer the one who Suna smiled for anymore.

And Osamu, too, thinks of the what-ifs just like Suna.

**Author's Note:**

> if you like it then leave some kudos and comments!


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